this is what Genevieve has sent me in reference to my underwear project idea:
it's called "the tent" by british artist, tracey emin.
it showed at the brooklyn museum in the mid nineties.
when you're in the tent, you realize that it's not just pattern and pretty she's making, but a history of all her lovers.
their names and some info about them is sewn into the cloth on the ceiling of the tent.
yes, i see why this piece came into genevieve's mind when she heard what i was trying to do.
and i do identify with the artist's way of displaying or expressing her personal information (which could be her secrets) through her art.
and it's mainly shown through typography which is written words.
but i just thought that I am still not sure whether to tell my secrets by writing it out in words just like she did about her lovers.
especially after I read Jacques derrida’s idea of secrecy, which Genevieve also has sent me.
==========================
genevieve: then he gets to the idea of the secret. this i interpret thusly: no response is adequate--language does not allow for an adequate response so the entirety of the response is secret in that it can never be revealed in its entirety. the secret is what exceeds the response or the ability to respond. name, p. 28: passion is "in place of the secret."
erw: i agree that secret conveys the idea that no formulation is adequate, that no testimony in words is sufficient, but remember that for derrida there is nothing but language or, as he puts it, there is nothing outside the text. that is to say, that the secret represents his understanding of the inherent limit of language even though there is no way beyond language.
genevieve: passion/ate response. in language, perhaps other than textual? and textual for him, of course, since he writes.
erw: yes, he is a writer. also recall that derrida critiques western philosophy for its logocentrism, which involves the claim that oral speech is prior to writing, as plato put it, we write what the mouth utters. for derrida, this needs to be reversed, for writing has a priority.
erw: the secret for derrida is different than the classical mystical traditions in that he does not believe in a transcendent being. he does not embrace the standard negative theology. for him the inherent secretive nature of language is that there is always a surplus of meaning. a writer writes but the meaning of what is written is subject to a play of interpretations.
genevieve: on the secret--what i said earlier, is it not the same? that the secret is what exceeds the response or the ability to respond?
erw: yes, it is the point you were making. i was just coming around to it in a slightly different way. there is an intrinsic link between word and deed, language as response and action as responsibility.
erw: there is also the connection of secret and gift. the gifting of language, which i believe he develops on the basis of heidegger's notion of thinking as giving thanks, denken und danken.
genevieve: name, p. 68: "it is a matter of holding the promise of saying the truth at any price, of testifying, of rendering oneself to the truth of the name, to the thing itself such as it must be named by the name, that is, beyond the name. the thing, save the name."
erw: there you have the paradox fully disclosed--to keep to the promise is to testify to the truth of the name, but to name the thing in its name is to go beyond the name because no name can testify exactly to the thing that it names. on the other hand, there is no way to the other except through the name. to go beyond the name is the ultimate act of naming. by now we understand that this naming is not merely a linguistic act. it involves acting in a fully embodied way in the world. what is a surname? sur-name, beyond the name. the task is to give a name--like adam as he is described in the second chapter of genesis--to give a name is the model of giving, and giving involves secrecy. there is no way to give except through the gift and there can be no gift without secrecy.
==========================
What interested me the most is how the language is never adequate way to respond, because language (written or said) inherently has limitations and impossible to really contain everything. Therefore everything we say or write in its very nature is secretive in some way or another.
So even if I think I am telling my secret, there’s gonna be always something more that is hidden from what is being said. And the thing is, I myself may not even know what is hidden. in this sense, I can never fully and completely reveal any of my secrets even if I tried to.
But then reversely, the act of “naming” or assigning words to form language can be also the very act of secrecy. Therefore utilizing the language (such as writing) itself can be a way of showing or expressing my secrets. I might be writing a particular secret down but at the same time, might be signifying that there’s another layer of secret being implied beyond my writing.
I don’t know.. it just got me thinking through a lot of things in circle,
and now I’m little confused.
Designing underwear conceptually (that is, to show my secrets visually) is one thing,
and writing my secrets out is another thing…
Monday, January 26, 2009
Secrets, and thoughts
I thought I had so many secrets.
Secrets that I would never tell anyone about.
not only that, I was always shy and felt uncomfortable talking about myself in general. i don't know why but doing so creates fears. causes uneasiness, even stressful sometimes.
while i was reluctant to tell mine,
I thought i would be very curious to know about other's secrets.
so I took a survey of 100 people to tell what they think of as their major secrets.
they include my best friends, families, acquaintances, friends of their friends, strangers.. etc.
a few refused, some wrote like an essay,
some were anonymous, and to my surprise, quite many were with names.
But the funny thing was that as I read out those secrets,
I felt like the secrets people told didn't feel as secretive as they seemed at all.
I said to myself,
"who cares if you had crush on Mickey?" (well, Mickey might have cared but, really?)
"so what if you never had sex?" or,
"oh, i've done exactly the same thing so how's that even a secret?"
after reading the secret surveys for a while i kind of got bored
and had no interest to read more of it.
(regardless of whether i know whose or don't)
what hit me was not so much of the content of the secrets,
but the fact that secrets are only secrets to oneself who keeps the secret.
in other words, their secrets are important only to themselves, and mine to myself.
it's funny how i first actually took effort to take the surveys,
thinking that i would be curious to find out other's secrets,
but realized that i am always so full of myself that i don't even really
(i mean really) care or interested enough about other's secrets.
And then also I looked back and remembered
whenever my friends say to me, "don't tell this to anyone, it's a secret"
i would say i won't tell anyone, and then forgetting about the whole thing right after.
secrets (whether to keep or reveal) are therefore really for the secret keeper itself,
and not for or because of anyone else. (maybe even the person involved or targeted in that particular secret)
so i asked myself, would others feel the same way?
why don't i tell my secrets and see their response?
what motivates people to keep secrets or reveal secrets, anyway?
and these thoughts triggered me to come up with the idea for my next project.
i want to try telling my secrets now.
to do so, im thinking of designing a series of underwear,
each containing one or more of my secrets.
I will design them conceptually according to the content of my secrets.
as a way of displaying them, i want to design an exhibition of some sort, with background set and etc..
and that will be my installation.
i might be wearing them and do a set of photoshoot too.
but when i make the underwears, i'm not sure how to show my secrets yet... simply write on them?i will design them conceptually but how do i show or say the specific content of the secret?
Secrets that I would never tell anyone about.
not only that, I was always shy and felt uncomfortable talking about myself in general. i don't know why but doing so creates fears. causes uneasiness, even stressful sometimes.
while i was reluctant to tell mine,
I thought i would be very curious to know about other's secrets.
so I took a survey of 100 people to tell what they think of as their major secrets.
they include my best friends, families, acquaintances, friends of their friends, strangers.. etc.
a few refused, some wrote like an essay,
some were anonymous, and to my surprise, quite many were with names.
But the funny thing was that as I read out those secrets,
I felt like the secrets people told didn't feel as secretive as they seemed at all.
I said to myself,
"who cares if you had crush on Mickey?" (well, Mickey might have cared but, really?)
"so what if you never had sex?" or,
"oh, i've done exactly the same thing so how's that even a secret?"
after reading the secret surveys for a while i kind of got bored
and had no interest to read more of it.
(regardless of whether i know whose or don't)
what hit me was not so much of the content of the secrets,
but the fact that secrets are only secrets to oneself who keeps the secret.
in other words, their secrets are important only to themselves, and mine to myself.
it's funny how i first actually took effort to take the surveys,
thinking that i would be curious to find out other's secrets,
but realized that i am always so full of myself that i don't even really
(i mean really) care or interested enough about other's secrets.
And then also I looked back and remembered
whenever my friends say to me, "don't tell this to anyone, it's a secret"
i would say i won't tell anyone, and then forgetting about the whole thing right after.
secrets (whether to keep or reveal) are therefore really for the secret keeper itself,
and not for or because of anyone else. (maybe even the person involved or targeted in that particular secret)
so i asked myself, would others feel the same way?
why don't i tell my secrets and see their response?
what motivates people to keep secrets or reveal secrets, anyway?
and these thoughts triggered me to come up with the idea for my next project.
i want to try telling my secrets now.
to do so, im thinking of designing a series of underwear,
each containing one or more of my secrets.
I will design them conceptually according to the content of my secrets.
as a way of displaying them, i want to design an exhibition of some sort, with background set and etc..
and that will be my installation.
i might be wearing them and do a set of photoshoot too.
but when i make the underwears, i'm not sure how to show my secrets yet... simply write on them?i will design them conceptually but how do i show or say the specific content of the secret?
survey
after i took few surveys, i realized that it's too complicated and mostly confusing to people.
i don't think i need that much information anyway.
so i made a new one, a simpler one, that asks people to simply tell what they think of as their "secrets" without categorizing so much. i doubted that people would write one, but so far i'm getting pretty good number of people answering.
i don't think i need that much information anyway.
so i made a new one, a simpler one, that asks people to simply tell what they think of as their "secrets" without categorizing so much. i doubted that people would write one, but so far i'm getting pretty good number of people answering.
part II. Secrecy
Sunday, January 25, 2009
usage chart
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